Monday, February 9, 2009


Dear Denise,

I miss this blog.

And in missing it I realize just how much this blog has kept your memory alive for me.

So.... whether it be healthy or unhealthy, I feel compelled to continue blogging about you. I'll do my best to keep any anger issues out of it.

I miss you so much.

Dear blog,

Today was especially difficult. Nathan is speaking before almost 600 people in less than 2 weeks out in California. Mark and I have been reviewing videos to show before his speech.

Let's just say, the day has brought it all back. Not that it ever leaves but some days are more intense for whatever reason.

I've been packing boxes (Mark and I are moving) and for whatever reason I've had visuals of Denise on and off all day.

Oh, sweetheart, this 9-1-1 crusade is a tough journey. I wonder sometimes if we jumped in too soon. I feel we need all our strength and all our energy to focus on it to get it done right. Since I stopped blogging on this blog there was another tragedy.

A baby boy stopped breathing and the mom called 9-1-1. Sadly and tragically she said "avenue" instead of "street" (I could have that backwards) and the paramedics went to the wrong home. They went to a home 30 miles away. Obviously it's not the dispatcher's fault. And equally obvious is it's not the young distraught mother's fault. But could the tragedy have been averted? Possibly. We just need to look at it.

Our fight has brought dispatchers down on us. They (at least the ones I've encountered on internet forums) have been greatly offended while others embrace out passion to help. There's no middle.

Anyhow, sweetheart, I miss you and love you.

The babies are well. Adam is a little echo. As is Noah. Noah mimics everything and loves being a dinosaur. Adam mimics Noah. But, of course, you know that. Please keep sending your spirit to us. We need it and cherish it. We are doing our best to instill it in the boys. I tell Noah he reminds me of his mommy all the time. Love you, baby.