Our last night in the house

Started out to be very depressing and then extremely frustrating. All the major big pieces of furniture have been moved out. We're down to just the necessities. Mark says it reminds him of college. For me it reminds me of my old apartment. We only have to move the TV, the bed, the computer (LOL) and a couple of chairs. Then, of course the kitchen stuff. And of course clothes.

The house is a mess with leftover items strewn all about. It's so depressing Mark and I are numb and can't make any decisions. I just look at some of the stuff and stare with a blank look on my face. A lot of it I've just tossed.

Anyhow, we had to get out and get away from all of it. It was that depressing. We needed some sort of diversion. Mark hadn't eaten all day. He had breakfast around 8AM and that was it. By 8PM he still hadn't had anything else to eat. I had driven thru Burger Barf on my way home from work. He didn't want that but I needed to eat something. Anyhow, it was late so I said "let's go get something for you to eat. I'll just have a beer and you need to eat. Let's get out of here" and we left.

On the way to Leverock's which is only about 5 miles from our house we ran out of gas. Apparently the gas gauge is broken. Nathan had borrowed the car while Mark used Nathan's truck. Mark said as we left the house "oh look! Nate filled up the gas tank! That was nice!" And I agreed. Well, Nathan didn't (he didn't think he had to cuz the gauge said 'full') and we ran out of gas. I felt like someone was sticking needles in me. I mean, really, it was the LAST thing we needed.

We cancelled our AAA a few months ago because of the expense. Therefore, Nathan ended up having to go buy a gas can and bring us gas. It was awful. Poor Nate had been working all day and was still in his Best Buy shirt. Mark was tired. I was tired. Mark was frustrated. I was numb.

So, after Nathan filled the car up we still went into the restaurant.

AND WOW! Were we pleasantly surprised! They had a couple playing live country music. It was wonderful. Music can be such therapy and it transported us to a different place emotionally. I asked the lady (who was fantastic singing Sugarland and Faith Hill) for a business card for future reference in playing at some of our 9-1-1 fundraisers. The man ended up being JR Davis's brother. JR was the Charlotte County policeman who listened with Rick (Denise's dad) to Denise's frantic 9-1-1 call. God bless him for that. I don't remember meeting JR but I'm sure we had to of either at the viewing or the funeral. We've met so many people and we were zombies at the time. But I think of JR quite often. He probably doesn't know that. But having read the IA report so many times it's hard not to think of someone who was that close to everything.

He's the person that finally requested and got the first BOLO issued out of Charlotte County. I'm sure he's been effected by all this. If he ever reads this, I want him to know how grateful we are to him and he'll always be in our prayers. My prayers are pretty meager right now, but they are prayers and they go out to him in gratitude.

What nice people at the restaurant. What talent! And what started out as a very dismal evening became a very pleasant evening for us.

You gotta understand we don't get out much. And we love country music. They even played some Keith Whitley. Wow! One song about Lori Morgan had me in tears (honestly that doesn't take much but it was beautiful).

I do hope they look into Lonestar's "Not a Day Goes By". I think this guy good do a fantastic job with it. I KNOW she could sing Faithless Love.....

This is their website:

http://www.beaunbeccad.com/

I feel very blessed tonight. I see light. Music is so good for the soul.

Denise Amber Lee and Matthew Cantrell, In Heaven Together

Today Mark has interviews with some professional video makers. (Sean did this one and it was beautiful. There were glitches tho' in the audio). Anyhow, Mark has to watch the video 3 more times today at those interviews. Since Nathan will be speaking more and more it's important to get something polished.

sigh

Putting your pain on public display is not an easy task. I truly don't know how Nathan does it. I guess he has his purpose and he's driven. My part was reading that IA report 3 times. That wasn't easy either. But I was driven and had my purpose.

I guess the human race can endure all sorts of suffering if in the end they feel they've contributed something positive to their fellow man.

I honestly believe 9-1-1 reform is desperately needed.

I was in communication with a family from Texas last week while the guys were away in California. They lost their son, Matthew, only a year old to a tragic accident. He accidentally got caught up in a soccer net. His mother called 9-1-1. She asked the 9-1-1 call taker 8 (eight) times "what should I do?" She was never told and wasn't connected to a EMT for another 2 and a half minutes. Even after being connected to the EMT she wasn't helped. They said she was too hysterical. Ugh!

The police arrived followed by the paramedics. Shockingly the police separated the mother from her dying son. Then when the paramedics arrived the police with arms spread out blocked their entry way and said that it was a crime scene. At least that's how I read the articles. I got it wrong or the articles did (nothing unusual there) because this is what the father told me:

"The paramedics that were blocked by the police were from the fire department. The first two paramedics had already entered my house. The first two paramedics were met by one of the police officers at the ambulance. This meant that the police officer left Matthew to tell the paramedics that 'He is gone' and 'This is a crime scene'. The paramedics had to advise the police officer that they would determine if he was alive. Matthew was alive, but was left for dead by the police officer and the police officer did delay the paramedics instead of helping them come inside."

Can you imagine? The boy wasn't dead. And he lived for another 3 days until the family decided to take him off life support. He was only a year old. sigh.

http://www.wfaa.com/sharedcontent/dws/wfaa/latestnews/stories/wfaa081119_lj_slater.1ca3c0112.html

It's bad. Bad things happen. And the little Texas town where this happened should be outraged. It was PRESUMED that the young mom intentionally hurt her child! It's just too horrific to think about. It's literally worse than a family's worst nightmare.

The dad says he relives all the facts over and over again. I do the same thing with the IA report. People say "don't dwell on it". Heh! Like we're trying to dwell on it.

Good for this young family from Texas! They are advocating changes in the 9-1-1 system. They already have had success getting the soccer nets recalled. They are driven to seeing that this never happens again to another little boy. God bless them for that and keep them strong.

Nathan is looking forward to meeting this family when he goes to Texas. Denise will not have died in vain and neither will have little Matthew.

Okay. I have to go pack. What a depressing day. Everyday without Denise is sad. And for this Texas family, everyday without Matthew must be as equally heartbreaking.

I don't know how their call taker was reprimanded. I should find out. The heartbroken family doesn't believe they were reprimanded at all.

The dad is supposed to send me a link to the 9-1-1 call. If I get his permission I'll post it.

Our call taker only had to take 12 hours of remedial training. heh. As if that's going to help. Some people are simply untrainable.

Much love and peace.

In other news:

We are moving this weekend. I don't know how we're going to do it. The piano was picked up today. We sent it over to Nathan's house. So, it's not too far away.

Again, much love and peace and please pray for the Cantrell family in Texas.

Little Matthew Cantrell. Sweet angel.