Friday, June 4, 2010

Crist signed the bill

I know I should be ecstatic and happy but why do I feel so bereft?

I guess it is because I feel Denise's life was too high of a price to have paid to see that 9-1-1 dispatchers and call takers get mandatory training.

It just makes no sense. I guess true change and great change only comes after a tragedy.

Why?

I just want to cry.

I still miss Denise everyday. My hurt and heartache has not gotten any easier to bear.

I cannot imagine how Denise's own parents feel or even Nathan.

But, thank goodness Charlie Crist signed it. Thank goodness several politicians took action.

When the bill was passed unaminously through the house, a 9-1-1 coordinator came up to Mark and I angry. Angry! Angry because he did not know how he was going to pay for it. Angry that he has to come up with $150,000.

$150,000????????? That is what he was worried about. Mark had to hold me back. All I said was "it had to be done" and then the man quietly agreed but had no idea how insensitive he had been. My heart broke. $150,000? That is nothing compared to Denise's life and the fact that Nate and the boys have to go on without her. The boys do not have their "mommy" tucking them in at nights, rocking them and kissing their booboos. They will never know her infectious smile. They will never remember her laugh. I could have smacked the man.

sigh

I should be happy I know.